Love Potion

Love

She had avoided it for the longest time but couldn’t any longer. Oh, the crazy things we do for love! Never before had it even occurred to her to do such a thing. And now? It was happening regularly, on a daily basis even. Her insatiable lust for him had lead her into sheer madness, she just wasn’t herself.

While falling deep into the trap of his undying love, she did the unthinkable…

She started, cooking for him!

After a few close calls with a fire alarm at the beginning, because roasting Indian spices is not as fun or easy as it looks! Although, are visits from hot firemen ever really uninvited? She made a mental note, to always wear lipgloss when cooking.

Surprised to end up enjoying it, she had previously rejected anything that felt domestic. Why now did this man bring such strange, unexplored gifts out of her?

There seemed to be a little bit of witchcraft involved.

This was the only possible explanation. By the power of some form of sorcery, he was turning her into his dream image of a wife! How dare he?

He’s dreaming again…Every time she enters the room the lighting is perfect and Lana Del Rey gently plays in the background.

She’s strong and soft, taking him to places he’s never been. He knows she’s unstoppable because he’s seen it so many times before.

She’s the one casting the spells. Naked under her apron, he can’t help but take a big piece of whatever she’s making, he’s got the disease. Hair flipped just so, her legs are always open.

“This is for you my love, it took me all afternoon to bake it!”

She can’t help herself, cooking just makes her want to dance…

While fabricating dreams she stirs tonight’s magic potion of love, each curve sways slowly this way, then that, then this way…

It’s almost time, for him to have a taste.

F.

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I wanna know what’s inside you.

Dear Marilyn Manson,

Soon we’ll be reunited once again, I’ve been counting the days. I still really enjoy, taking my clothes off to your music. How many times has it played in the background while I was having sex? I think this will forever remain a mystery. Some memories are not worth reliving a second time. I’ve been watching your recent music video excursions with Johnny Depp and I must say, that I approve. Although I can’t decide what I would like more, watching you both go at it, or making a naked sandwich with me in the middle and the two of you as my tasty pieces of white bread. Will continue to further contemplate this…

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I’ve seen the pictures of you and Johnny smoking pot in the bushes…How cool would it be to spend the night partying with you two! By partying I mean filthy stuff, but I feel like that goes without saying at this point. Although I’ve only had one threesome and it was terrible, so I unfortunately would be coming into this with a bit of a negative perspective. If anything, you boys are the ones who can turn this situation around…

I don’t think I would just be speaking for myself when I say things are kinda like this… You go through shit, you listen to some Marilyn Manson and you move the fuck on! There is no healthier way to go about doing things.

A friend of mine was working at a show in Montreal years ago and after the fact he told me, you were running around naked backstage. I was all like, ”Marilyn Manson was running around naked backstage and you didn’t call me? What is wrong with you!?” Needless to say, we never spoke again, I still haven’t forgiven him.

To properly research this piece I have been forcing myself to listen to lots of your music. Forcing isn’t really a good word. I once fell in love with a guy simply because he did a striptease to your version of, “Personal Jesus.” No joke. All I can say is, short jean shorts and you would have wanted him too!

I don’t know how you have stayed current in this ever changing, complex world but kudos to you. Only a modern artist can change with the times and make what is dark in the world and in his own life into something beautiful. Listening to your music has helped to heal some of my wounds from loss over the past year, thank you!

Moving onto other pressing matters, how come no one has ever burned my fishnets off? More specifically, how come YOU, Marilyn Manson have never burned MY fishnets off?

Can’t say how excited I am for your show!

F.

P.S. I won’t be wearing any underwear, please don’t wear any either…

Farewell my furry baby

Su&LILHere lies the empty basket where you used to sleep. It holds nothing in it now, except for maybe my scarred heart and some not too distant memories. Remember when you opened your cage, while Enya played in the background and I took it as a sign that you were meant to be mine? And then you were…

Dear Sushi,

Goodbye Mr. SuSu, goodbye my furry baby, goodbye my little friend. You will be missed and never forgotten.

Thank you for the endless love from your pure, sweet heart.

Thank you for teaching me that the most important things in life are; love, food, stretching and being silly… Soon followed by, making sure you’re flexible enough to lick your own ass when necessary.

I wish I could snuggle your wet nose one more time.

If only everything was as simple as how much I loved your peaceful, kind, old soul.

How grateful I am that you did not suffer or that might have broken my heart completely.

Come visit me in my dreams if you can. Let me know you are safely resting in the arms of those that went before you, who were also deeply loved.

You were the first special soul I lost without having the chance to say, goodbye. Goodbyes are for those left living, they are our selfish way to reach some point of closure after heartbreaking loss.

Thank you for reminding me that I may not get the chance to have a final moment to profess my love.

One day a long time ago, when I thought I wasn’t ready to love again, you came into my life and reminded me that I could. You were good at that.

How come sometimes animals can be so good at knowing what you need when people can’t? Somehow, you always knew.

You knew when I needed to be loved and cuddled, you knew when I just needed your silent presence at the foot of my bed, you knew.

It shouldn’t have come as a surprise, when Lilies left us a few months after you did. The two of you didn’t want to be apart.

So much loss in such a short period of time…

Some of my favourite moments were seeing you hanging out with Mom and Dad. You even turned Daddy into an animal lover! You are both a part of our family, we all miss you.

I am relieved now that you are back together, it comforts me. Always take care of each other.

Rest in peace my loves,

F.

Holiday Jumpers

xmas blogWhile riding a delayed subway one day, you hear the announcement that there has been a, “personal injury at track level.” Do you know what this means? This is code, at least in Toronto, Ontario for a rail suicide or when someone has chosen to try to end their own life.

Suicide like most terrible life events immediately puts things in perspective. On one hand we have human life lost, on the other being late for work. Hopefully you’re not the jerk with his head so far up his own ass that he’s not able to look beyond the delay in his schedule.

I heard this announcement, not once but twice in one night at two separate subway stations. Maybe December’s cold, glitter and gift giving had suddenly become too much…maybe something else, it’s a little late for the reason to matter now.

I wasn’t sure when I heard the announcement what it meant. I guess on some level I knew but was hoping for something else. In the complicated times that we live in, truth is the only thing that will set us free.

There is no reason why we shouldn’t be told exactly why there is a delay, in a clear statement as they do in other cities like New York. Vague statements with meanings that might not be common knowledge can only cause unnecessary confusion, frustration, impatience and insensitivity to the tragic event at hand. I overheard several people talking about a possible terror threat, others were filming what they thought was just fun commuter chaos until they got close enough to see the injured body on the platform.

We deserve to know what is happening so we can react accordingly. The mind can be a scary place and a stopped subway car that you are being told to evacuate, can trigger all kinds of colourful thoughts in people’s heads.

The most impressive character of the night was Joe Schmo coming back from his Christmas  party annoyed that this was putting a damper on his festivities. Maybe he would have felt a bit more sympathy for the person if it was his wife, brother, daughter or boyfriend. It’s easy to judge a situation from the outside never thinking something so terrible could happen to us, until our loved one is lying on the subway tracks.

What is being done to stop these tragedies from happening? The ultimate goal and the solution that has shown to be most effective is to build barriers along the subway platforms. Doing this is very costly, but can we really make something that has been proven to save lives about a price tag?  Help line posters have been placed throughout every station hopefully being seen at the right time.

There is always someone there to listen, suicide is never the answer. If you are having thoughts of self-harm call 416-408-HELP, go to your nearest hospital or call 911.

Please take a moment to like and share this post. Thank you!

F.

Goodbye Letter to Papa

papaThe day I was born was one of the happiest days of my grandfather’s life. Every year his voice singing, “Happy Birthday” opera style, was a cherished part of my celebrating. After 92 years of singing, on that day, we could no longer hear his voice.

Dear Guido,

Let us hear you sing one more time,
come laugh with us.

Your smile is surely what we will miss most…

Promise to smile for us soon, if only this time as an angel in our dreams.

We shall not cry, no.
We won’t shed a tear.


We are among the fortunate ones who got to share our life with someone as special as you are.


Instead we will learn from your example; and dance, sing, laugh and love…

Throughout the good, and we will do it even more during the hardest times.


We will tear up the dance floor when we are almost 90 and remain active.

You understood how sitting for too long was bad and moving was what kept you young.


Forever young

Cracking jokes and smiling,

Till you took your last breath.


A smile which did in fact have the power to light up a room.


We will pick roses in the garden for our wives and stay light hearted about life,

befriending everyone.

Take our grandchildren on our laps, letting them know they are forever loved.


We promise not to cry Guido,

Instead we will raise a glass

In honor of this prince who shared our life with us who will be so dearly missed.


We will celebrate every moment,

Even the ones when our hearts are breaking.


We celebrate you Guido,

We toast to you!


Forever in our hearts and never forgotten.

Sing for the angels now, Papa!


How lucky they are to have you…

Love,

your granddaughter

F.

My Favorite Things

& now something positive!

I’ve been practising singing a song for a special little girl in my life.

I think I’m doing a reasonable job so far, the cat approaches me when I’m singing and doesn’t quickly run out of the room. He could also just be coming closer because he’s trying to claw my eyes out, I guess we’ll see…

The song is, “My Favorite Things”.

When the dog bites, when the bee stings

When I’m feeling sad

I simply remember my favourite things

And then I don’t feel so bad

No matter who you are or whatever planet you’re from, everyone has a list of favorite things.

There is a key to every heart, we all have memories, moments, tastes, smells and loved ones that immediately can make us happy.

What if part of getting over a really bad day was about taking a moment to remember or focus on some of our favorite things?

I had the recent opportunity to see Tony Robbins live and participate in a guided heart meditation, where he asks you to remember three things you are truly grateful for.

How amazing does it feel, to outwardly send a thank you to the universe with your whole heart for the blessings you just couldn’t live without! Why don’t I just sit in gratitude more often?

Also, why do I want to have sex with this man so bad! Tony Robbins is to motivational coaching what Leonard Cohen is to music! Tony really speaks to me and I’m not just talking about my crotch area…Not in a weird cultish kind of way, but in an honest everything he says seems to make a lot of sense way.

I was PMSing when I attended his seminar so the experience was a bit of an emotional roller coaster.

I laughed, I cried, hugged some strangers, felt truly alive & close to B., checked if I looked fat in the bathroom mirror and had a shit load of carbs as soon as it was all over!

CSIWithout further delay here are some of my favorite things in no particular order:

Watching the sunset with my toes in the water,

Killing my workout,

Cat paws

Sipping a coconut with a straw & dancing with Papa.

Stepping off a plane in a new place to explore…

The first smell of spring lilacs,coconut

Endless kisses from B.

Spending the day writing under a tree

& being an auntie.

Take a minute to think about some of your favorite things and please like & share this post 🙂

F.

Update: Ontario Monster Vet

evil-vet

Letter Series Chapter 6:

Dear Universe,

I have a pressing request. If at any point soon women could stop being described with belittling and shallow statements such as; braless, age defying and makeup free, I would be very grateful.

Change takes time so here’s something else… There is a cruel man who hurt some innocent animals. Don’t give him the chance to do it again.

A six month suspension can’t undue evil, he should never be allowed near another animal! July 14th is a date I need you to remember, on this day justice has to be served.

I’m afraid of calling the Skyway Animal Hospital and for it to actually be real that Dr. Mahavir Rekhi is practising again!

Long live the internet and its ability to share information. Doing something wrong now means not only having news articles written about it, word continues to spread through blogs, social media, shared videos and google reviews.

What good is technology if we can’t use it to prosecute the accused? There is video footage of this man punching and choking animals in his care. Many videos, why is he back in business right now?

Those of us who love animals get to be bombarded with terrible imagery on a daily basis. Heinous acts bestowed upon the innocent without reason.

Our pets are a part of the family. They are not something we abuse, neglect or put in a garbage bin.

We would NEVER want to be put in a situation where the doctor who is supposed to be helping and healing our loved one is intentionally hurting them. This guy is out!

What if he just leaves the province of Ontario, changes his name and starts practising somewhere else? The TERROR!

Please let anyone who brings their animal into this man’s office, either recognize his face or somehow instinctively know they need to grab their pet and back the fuck out of there ASAP.

I’m all for forgiveness, but when it comes to animals and children you don’t get a second chance. This man is not fit to care for anything that is living and breathing, end of story.

According to the receptionist at Skyway Animal Hospital, Dr. Mahavir Rekhi has taken some time off, but is still practising. My response to him was, “If I were you I would reassess my employment options and I would go get a job at McDonald’s before continuing to work for THIS guy. No one should be encouraging him to stay open.”

Yours Truly, F.

PS Hope is on the horizon, Rekhi has been charged with 16 counts of animal cruelty. Now we wait for the outcome of his July 14th court date.

PPS I’ve included a picture of our Nero, he is a part of my heart.Nero 2017

Please take a moment to like and share this post. Thank you!

Signed w/ Love

signed w: love

Letter Series Chapter 5:

Dear Sir or Madame at the corner of Church and Wellesley,

We are so sorry we have failed you. We’re sorry that on this hellishly cold night, your home is an icy street corner.

In a quest for survival you have turned yourself into a living mummy, large sleeping bags cover you from head to toe. An unsettling image to say the least, a faceless mound of woollen layers that still aren’t warm enough.

No outstretched hand to ignore, no hardened eyes…

Please show us your face, please make some kind of small sign that you’re ok. Some sign that all hope is not lost, that you haven’t fallen too deep and given up on everything completely.

In an effort to offer some kind of gesture, a few people have left McFlurry ice cream. You could probably really use a warm home cooked meal, you deserve to be having one.

You deserve everything that you need. Healthy food, a warm bed and love. You deserve to be loved and taken care of.

This is our failure, what good are we if we can’t figure out a way to help one another. If we have allowed ourselves to become so accustomed to walking right by, without even taking a second glance.

We’re sorry you are suffering. Spending hours and hours on end out in this treacherous weather, when most of us can’t even handle the walk to our pre-heated cars.

Even with all the other atrocities happening in our world today, your misery matters. Your life matters. Finding a way to help you matters. It matters to me.

I searched for you the other day at the corner of Church and Wellesley, but you were nowhere to be found. Sending prayers and blessings your way, wherever you are.

Here’s hoping that life has decided to be a bit less cruel to you and that things have started moving in a better direction.

Here’s hoping that the light at the end of the big dark tunnel is shining so bright, that it fills you with strength and guides you to happiness.

Here’s hoping…

Love,

F.

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Nasty President

What are they marching for? If you are asking yourself this question please take a moment to crawl out from the rock you’ve been living under while you continue to contemplate the answer.

Who cares that it’s the largest day of protests in U.S. history, in the end it is just a women’s march, right?

Let’s pretend we don’t know what the message is and make it about the things that are insignificant. Let’s be appalled that women use swear words and let’s talk about the, ”pussy ear” hats they were wearing and did you notice so and so celebrity had their face pulled back again!

Last but certainly not least let’s call for the arrest of the most famous attendee because we’re taking one statement she made out of context. This is Madonna we’re talking about! Every moment of her career has been about shock value. Did you think she was going to stand by the podium at a women’s march and knit a bonnet?

She began her speech with, “Welcome to the revolution of love.” Isn’t anyone ever listening?

If you don’t think that women need to be protesting Donald Trump being President of the United States then you are part of the fucken problem! Notice my use of the word, “fuck.”

Since there are no arrests to report, we desperately search for a way to make this negative. Madonna might be a terrorist, I think we found the root of all our problems.

“Grab them by the pussy.” is A-OK but the f-word is where we must draw the line!

Still wondering what all the shouting is about?

Here is a great place to start, a gut churning compilation entitled, “Donald Trump all the sexist things he said.

I can’t help but raise my voice.

F.

You are More than your Size.

Cold, dirty snow slaps me in the face with the appropriate song lyric, “Bitch I’m Madonna” trapped in my head…

So did you hear she’s dating another twenty-five year old model? Please keep it up Madonna!

Break those boundaries into tiny pieces and pave the road for the rest of us who may also want to show our ass and fuck twenty something models when we’re almost sixty. 

Would some of Madonna’s choices be as shocking or interesting to us if she were a man? She claims we live in a sexist, ageist society and who can honestly disagree.

In the ‘90’s she ruffled feathers with what was at the time considered controversial imagery, her dancing in front of burning crosses and dabbling in BDSM. Would she have found it amusing then, to know that having a sex life in her late fifties gets people talking just as much!

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I’ve never been a huge fan but have appreciated some of her messages; strength, rule breaking and the power to keep re-inventing yourself. At times her tactics may be a bit overdone, but we can all understand the need to hammer people over the head with something to get their undivided attention.

In our modern age of cosmetic and digital enhancement who are the women in the media truly trying to encourage empowerment?

I have hated my fatter self and can totally feel someone like Ashley Graham. She’s all like, Hey look over here I’m big AND beautiful. You thought fat wasn’t sexy, well check out THIS body!

Ashley rejects the label, ”plus-size” and doesn’t want to be put into a box because of the number inside her pants.

The crazy concept that a woman is more than her physical self, imagine!

Starting with even the smallest change matters, like making a conscious effort to tell our daughters, nieces and granddaughters that they are strong and smart just as often as cute or pretty.

F.

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